by: Heather Charlton

In 2007 we made our first move with my husband’s company, leaving behind family, friends, our first home, a state we love, and many wonderful memories. We had an 18-month-old and I was pregnant with our second child. While I thought I was prepared for the adventure this road would bring; the slow, overwhelming sense of loneliness slowly found its way in to my life. I found myself in a new community, without family, without friends, and WITH two small children. My husband was working more than usual learning a new job and I truly did feel blessed to be at home. While I am generally an adventurous person, willing to go outside my comfort zone to get involved and adapt-I admit it… struggled!

When my son was a newborn, I remember all of us-the baby, my two year old daughter, myself, and even our chocolate lab- all crowded in front of the window around 5:15 pm each day in anticipation of my husband’s arrival home from work. We would watch intently to catch the first glimpse of that white SUV turn the corner onto our street. As he approached the driveway, the dog began to bark and my daughter would cheer.  As he walked up the sidewalk and opened the door, he was attacked by us all. I remember the flood of relief that came over me in that moment. I wasn’t alone.

Whatever the stage of life, we often can find ourselves lost in a sea of the ordinary and monotonous. As a stay-at-home mom, I many times felt alone and isolated. I felt trapped in my own home, no longer able to relate beyond the details of feedings, diapers, picky eating and two-year old tantrums. Each day brought more of the same. Though I found mom friends, I attended groups with other moms, I talked on the phone with other moms, I read articles and books about motherhood…there was an endless element of isolation. Though each day, my husband walked through the door and I felt hope, still there was a missing component.   

Blaise Pascal said that “there is a God shaped vacuum in the heart of every man which cannot be filled by any created thing, but only by God, the Creator, made known through Jesus.” Though we may feel alone and isolated, the Bible tells us that we have a Savior who knows the feeling of our every suffering, our every affliction. I discovered that in my case, the cure for isolation was more in spirit then in body. I began taking my loneliness to the One who created, me-created me for relationship with Himself.

Now in 2011, with yet another move under my belt and another in the near future, I am learning to rely on God to be my ever-present help; the one who sustains me. I can call on Him in those moments of loneliness, thank Him for my dear family, beg for creativity to break the monotony, and ask Him to provide precious community.

“I raise my eyes to the mountains, where will my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, Maker of Heaven and Earth.” Psalm 121:1-2


Taking it One-to-One:

  • Do you look to other people to fill that void in your heart instead of to God?
  • Do you spend time with God in prayer and in His Word? Or do you take fellowship with Him for granted?
  • We are created to be in community with other people, so in what ways can you make connections with other believers?