How often do you argue about your in‐laws? What are the main points of contention?
When you and your spouse attempt to resolve conflicts around your in‐laws, are you ever able to reach a point where you have a workable solution you can both live with?
How have you and your spouse handled expectations surrounding parents and holidays, visiting, grandchildren, etc.?
How have discussions with your parents gone with regard to their level of involvement in your marriage?
The Bible says a man will “leave father and mother” to join with his wife and become one. What are some of the practical ways you have left your father and mother? What are some things you could do that would help to promote more oneness as a couple?
What are some ways each of your parents have given you the freedom to establish your own identity as a couple? In what areas would you still like adjustments to be made?
How could you facilitate a loving, respectful conversation about this with your
spouse?
What practical things are you doing to make your spouse your most important earthly relationship? What is your spouse doing to show that you are most important?
How have you seen your primary loyalty and dependency switch from your parents to each other?
What are some areas where you fear displeasing your parents? How does your spouse fear displeasing his/her parents?
In what areas do you tend to be hypersensitive to what your in-laws do or say?
How do you and your spouse strive to show honor to both sets of parents (Exodus 20:12)?
How does your spouse feel you extend honor to his/her parents? How would our spouse say that you dishonor his/her parents?
How do you and/or your spouse feel suffocated or controlled with the demands and expectations of your parents?
What do you and your spouse agree on when it comes to building a healthier relationship with your in-laws? What are some of the ways that you differ on how to improve those relationships?
What do you think about the idea of getting a good book or workbook on marriage oneness and beginning to read that with your spouse? What other ways could help you protect your marriage from outside threats?
What is one step you can take in the right direction and who can help you do that?