Esteem your mentee for reaching out to a mentor at this time.
Encourage your mentee to get involved in a local, Bible-believing church for spiritual growth and accountability.
Encourage your mentee to be committed to purity, not just technical virginity. Help him/her understand the difference.
Encourage your mentee to be committed to emotional purity, not just physical purity.
Encourage your mentee not to let his past defeats to keep him from being pure from this time forward.
Encourage your mentee to see moral purity as an integral part of womanhood and manhood, and as an important investment into their future marriage relationship.
Encourage your mentee to see that boundaries are for protection and joy.
Encourage your mentee to pray daily about this area of life.
Encourage your mentee to decide on appropriate boundaries ahead of time and to guard against compromising situations.
Encourage your mentee to examine his/her media intake, such as internet sites visited, TV viewing, etc., that affect viewpoint on this area and might lead to temptation.
Encourage your mentee to realize that marital intimacy in the future will be well worth the wait sexually now.
Encourage your mentee to pursue God first and trust that “all these things will be added” later (Matthew 6:33)
Talk to your spouse about what affection was like in your family growing up (verbal and non-verbal).
Think about how your father and mother may have shown affection differently.
Discuss ways your family could express more affection for one another.
On a scale of 1-10, rate how much affection you feel you have in your marriage right now. Talk about what you would like it to be if you and your spouse could agree on how to gently and patiently bring about change.
Consider discussing your sexual past with your spouse in a way that is open and honest.
Talk about the limits you and your spouse have put on pornography and how you feel those are working.
Discuss how each of you defines pornography. Talk about ways you define it differently.
